It was supposed to be every 20 hours of gameplay, but the inception of this idea occurred to me after a monumental achievement. After clocking in 23+ hours, I beat my second Demon boss. Armor Spider, I believe was its name. If you have familiarized yourself with this site, you may have noticed my video game taste borders on the masochistic. And this game is as hard as they come.


Demon’s Souls is old shit, what with the PS4 available now, and Dark Souls II already out. So I figured I’d round up a few classics before it was time to bid the PS3 console farewell for good. The game is already into its third installment, which I also own but won’t play until I put 100 hours in. This post series will stop at 100 hours whether I wrap the game or not.

My first six hours were arguably the most futile, fruitless, and painful. Let’s take it back to the beginning, shall we? First thing, obviously, is you create your character and select its class (Knight, Royal, Warrior, etc.) each with a distinct set of default stats, or abilities, and consequently, weapon suitability. I picked Thief, made her female, and named her Newt. I figured if my character was going to spend a lot of time on its back, might as be female (Whoa, relax, ladies! It was still funny, admit it). After you pick a class you start playing in Soul form and don’t gain your Human form until you’ve beaten a stage boss, or — available after the first stage you clear — use the Ephemeral Eye stone. To start the game, the story pits you, in Human form, against a super Demon that will slay you within seconds before the game itself starts. But that doesn’t count, being a distant and brief memory, because when you play in human form again, and it will be brief too, it may well feel like the first time.

What you do next has no bearing on any canon or order. As far as I know. You have five Worlds you can teleport to by touching an engraving on a pillar. Listen, you’re a fucking specter half the time you play, you’re allowed to do these things. These walls, columns adorning a hall known as the Nexus in a semi-circle, are your way out, with something known as Archstones placed in between stages acting as your way back to the Nexus. It’s either that or an artifact called the Nexial Binding I see no use for since it sends you home pending forfeiture of all Souls (game currency) you’ve gained. Like you had any to spare. But the beauty of this game is once you’re out slaying Demons, you may want nothing to do with much of everything else — in the game of course. The game can be played with the guidance of a walkthrough, that’s gamer for guide, or you could just dive in head first. The latter approach is only advisable (it really never is an advisable approach to consider, but neutral objectivity, I guess) after you’ve mastered enough principle to tread into new areas carefully, and I assume, some basic understanding of magic power and magic defense. You know, what shield works best against what ranged magic attack. You could always go the trial and error way and not worry where each penny goes, because you will spend a few Souls needlessly on a mis-prioritized upgrade or item.

Oh, the Souls will get you weapon and skill upgrades, armor and weapon repairs and a slew of consumables. And Souls are lost when you die, but can be retrieved if you manage to make it back where you last died because you will start all over (Archstone location, remember?) and will risk life and limb for the sake of continuity. And sanity. But if you die on your way to retrieve them you lose them for good. Or rather your Blood Stain gets replaced with where you most recently died, with the number of Souls earned up to your most recent death waiting. Did I mentioned how cruelty and sadism turned inward are known as masochism?

Anyway so my first six or so hours basically consisted of learning the ropes, the hard way. I figure I must have died in Boletaria Palace twenty times before I got through the first Fog, but the kicker here is that Souls accumulate as all enemies respawn with every restart so long as you don’t break the pattern of die-retrieve-accumulate then die all over again. It was all fun and games until I lost my first fourteen-hundred Souls for good. Every stage features a large number of slouch enemies, pushovers capable of only melee attacks, punctuated by tougher ones at key locations. Key because it is precisely when you let your guard down or are in need for a much wanted respite. So I googled some game FAQs and tried again, and again.

So far I’ve noticed all the stages (haha, all three I’ve played) have two ways through to the Boss. While the enemies all respawn, the doorways you clear stay unlocked, meaning by the time you’re ready to face the Demon boss, there’s a much quicker way through. I’m willing to bet all stages involve going in a circle unlocking doors until you finish near you basically started. At least the first one of each World, which is what I’ve been doing.

I’ve finished Boletaria Palace in 14 hours and decided to give the next stage a try until I got bored with the locale and slow progress. Phalanx was dumb (the Demon boss of Boletaria Palace 1). He’s the zombie of Demon’s Souls bosses. In all fairness, I lucked out in having enough Turpentine to attack him in one go since he’s weak against fire. He could have mauled my ass just as easily. Where you kill one Boss is where the next Archstone will be placed, something of a checkpoint you respawn at when you die. I got tired of seeing that place and luckily enough, a much needed change of scenery can be coupled with the mandatory powering up to stay hooked, so Stonefang Tunnel it was next.

Stonefang Tunnel didn’t feature a tunnel per se. It was right around the time I took a liking to the Short Sword after needlessly upgrading all swords several levels just to realize only two were by miles the most effective. No harm though. The stage got a lot easier when I picked up the Wooden Catalyst, a necessary tool for casting magic spells. It escapes my memory where I picked it up, but in the first stage of the creepy Tower of Latria, I found the Silver Catalyst. Stonefang is weird and is cursed by an eternal sunset, if a sunset was ever allowed to be such. But the more you progress into the place the darker it gets suggesting passage of time. Until (ready for it) you make it full circle and realize the sunlight was obscured behind a cliff the entire time. Once you get past the first Fog, it becomes dreary with enslaved humanoid workers populating an unfinished behemoth of scaffolding, cliffside mines, workshops, and steel mill all in one. As that wasn’t bizarre enough, the game’s most skilled blacksmith decided to set up shop in the area. Blacksmith Ed. That scaley-ass fool.

Anyway, time to wrap this up because I’m almost all the way through the first stage of Tower of Latria, and that belongs to the next post. Something tells me all that time earning those upgrades is starting to pay off now. My health bar can take a few hits and still have some life.

Adios, los slayers del Diablo!